There are some people who always blame themselves. These people usually have low self-confidence. In this paper, we try to help those who constantly blame themselves and they are tired of this behavior.
What will really happen when we blame ourselves?
When someone blame himself, in fact he is involved in an internal conversation. However, internal conversation is a natural issue and all people may do the same. But those who always blame themselves, the internal conversation may occur for them critically and in a censorious way.
Criticism is not only bad, but also it can help to improvement and amelioration. The critical internal conversation may have negative effects on a person when it is permanent. Therefore, if you constantly have critical internal conversation with yourself, you are confronted with the worst critic in the world; because your mind is always with you.
Whenever you make a mistake, this internal critic wakes up and starts to blame you. This causes you lose your self-confidence. And a person with low self-confidence cannot use his capabilities. And when you cannot use your abilities, your self-confidence will get less and less.
For many people, this annoying process will last forever. So, we should find a solution to get rid of the constant blames of our internal conversation. Of course, consider this point that the aim of your internal voice is to make you better. Thus, do not wish to suppress this voice forever. We should just know that we don’t have to listen to whatever is said by our internal voice. Therefore, if your internal voice does not support you and always blame you, follow the steps below in order to control your internal critic.
How can we control our internal slater critic?
You can do the following steps to control your internal slater critic:
- Please wait until something happens and your internal critic starts to blame. Or remember when your internal voice has blamed you.
- When the internal blames started, try to detect the sound direction, you feel the sound if from head-on or behind you? Do you feel the sound from your inside or outside?
- After detecting the sound direction, move your hand forward and raise your thumb or index finger.
- Now, guide the sound towards your finger with the help of your mind. Since the voice is in your mind, then you can lead it with your mind. Now, you feel this sound is talking to you from your finger.
- Now that you could change the sound direction by your mind, change the tone of voice, too. Make the voice louder or slower. Or even change the voice into the voice of a character in a cartoon through your mind.
- With your mind, now you can reduce the threatening level of voice.
When you do these 6 steps, you practically change the critical and slater nature of your internal voice. When your internal voice does not support you, it is better to change it. As if when we constantly shout at a child, he may lose his self-confidence. If our internal voice permanently blame us, we will lose our self-confidence, too. In next stage, you should do something your internal voice be constructive, not destructive.
How can we change the critical and slater tone of our internal voice?
After you controlled your internal blaming sound through the 6 steps, now you can change it to an encouraging tone. For this purpose, you need to follow these steps:
- First, remember when your internal voice constantly blames you after making a mistake. Do you remember exactly what your internal voice said you?
- Now ask yourself, how I can repeat these words to myself in an encouraging way. Now that you are not under the pressure of your internal voice’s criticisms, you can examine those words more easily and change your tone.
- After you were succeed to change the tone of your internal voice, turn back to when you made a mistake and this time you criticize yourself without blaming yourself.
You can do these steps repeatedly until you change the tone of your internal voice in the best and most effective form. Thereby, you will gain your lost self-confidence and you can move faster towards prosperity.