If we know how to use the efficacy of the words, we can influence the others. Two important parts of every communication are talking and listening.
In this article, we teach 4 golden points for you to use the efficacy of the words and affect the audience correctly. These 4 golden points are about using these words correctly: I try, I can’t, but and forbidding the others.
The first point about the efficacy of the words: I try
Suppose you ask your friend to inform you about something as soon as possible. That person tells you, “I try to call you tomorrow.” What message do you get from these words? Is the message that your friend will call you tomorrow? Or is the message that your friend may not call you tomorrow? You will probably wonder if your friend calls you.
When we use the word I try, we are sending this message to the audience: ‘’ Do not expect much, what I said may not be feasible’’. So it is better not to use ‘’I try’’ in our conversations. If we want to use, we must use wisely and appropriately. For example, we can use ‘’I try’’ somewhere that we do not want to make the others much hopeful.
The second point about the efficacy of the words: I can’t
When do we use the word ‘’I can’t’’? Usually, when we try different ways or we see ourselves in deadlock for any reason. So when we use this word in conversations, we are making the audience feel that we are in deadlock.
Suppose you are in a working session. If you say: “We cannot come to the conclusion by this way” we unconsciously put the others’ minds in a deadlock. The correct way to use the efficacy of the words is that we have to present a solution instead of going to the deadlock. For example, we can say: “We need to look for another solution.” In this sentence, there is a message that we cannot come to the conclusion by this way. But it makes the others’ minds opened for searching to find a new way.
Do you pay attention to the efficacy of the words? The two simple sentences are so different. With the first sentence, a working session can be headed to the deadlock, and with the other sentence, the colleagues can be headed to create the new idea. So we should pay attention to the efficacy of the words.
The third point about the efficacy of the words: But
The efficacy of the word ‘’but’’ is reducing the importance of the previous contents. Look at this example: “You can be on a diet to lose weight, but I recommend you not to forget exercising.” In this example we are making the effects of exercising more than being in a diet by using the word ‘’but’’. If you want to use the efficacy of the words correctly, you should pay attention to the correct using of the word ‘’but’’.
Many get used to use the word ‘’but’’. You can replace the word ‘’but’’ with “and”. So the effect of the word ‘’but’’ is disappeared. For example: “Everything is fine, things are going well and….” So we don’t have the idea that there’s probably a problem. Or you can say this: “You can be on a diet to lose weight, and I recommend you not to forget exercising.” In this example, when the word “and” is replaced with the word ‘’but’’, the statements before and after “and” are both the same, and the first sentence will not be less important.
The fourth point about the efficacy of the words – Forbid
What do you think about now? Probably you think about a blue elephant. When you forbid someone from something, you are guiding the mind of that person to think about the same thing. The people’s unconscious mind is planned easily. So we have to to be aware of the effects of the words.
For example, if we say to one person at work: “Do not forget to send this letter today”, we have increased the probability of forgetting the letter to be sent. If the letter is not sent, no one blames you, but the fact is that you make a part of this mistake. Yes, the effects of the words are more than what most people think.
These 4 points are the golden points that you can use them to manage the conversations and the different situations and affect the others as you like.