Most people like to marry someone whom they have full trust in her. But the full trust is harmful for the life. Read this article carefully to the end to understand the reasons.
What is the full trust in marriage?
When we talk about full trust in marriage and life, we mean trusting our partner in a way that we cannot imagine her temptation in any situations. Please be careful! When we say full trust is harmful in marital life, it does not mean we have to doubt our partner. We do not want to propagate skepticism.
For a better explanation, we ask a question. Is it really true to have a full trust to our brother in a business relationship? If you are familiar with the trade and business, your answer is certainly negative. When you do not trust your brother, it does not mean that you think he is a thief or unworthy person. But not having the full trust here means that you cannot ignore the possibility of mistake, slipping, or any other problems.
So when we talk about full trust in life, we do not want to lead your mind to the sinfulness of your partner. We explain full trust completely, now we want to examine why having a full trust in life is harmful.
Why is it harmful to have full trust in life?
Again, let’s return to the example of trusting our brother. What happens when you trust your brother in business affairs? One of the problems is that you may spend less time for the issues that are for both of you. Because you say to yourself: My brother is here and there will be no mistake.
On the other hand, if your brother is in a difficult situation, you get away from him and you may not quickly know his problem to help him. The marital life in this regard is very similar to the working and business. It means that in spite of the full trust, there may be similar problems in marital life.
If there is a full trust in the marital life, you will face with the problems which are described below.
۱- Your spouse’s value decrease
When you have a full trust in your life, your spouse’s value decrease for you. But if you believe that your partner can attract someone else, her attraction won’t be tedious for you and you always try to be attractive for her.
۲- The presence of your spouse is not attractive any more
When you think that your spouse will not be in error in any situations, her presence won’t be so attractive for you anymore. It means that your partner’s presence will be a little over the time, until he/she become disappear in your mind. But if that full trust does not exist, you always pay attention to your spouse. Of course, not to control her but to thank her because of her attention and loyalty.
۳- Reducing the respect
When you have full trust to your partner, you believe that any bad behavior does not harm her and your partner will never be disappointed of you. So, if we remove this belief from our minds that our full trust to our partner is our right, we never allow ourselves to have any bad behavior with our spouse. In this way, we keep more respect for each other.
How can the lack of full trust help the marital life?
Again, let’s return to an example of trusting your brother in business issues. If you do not trust your brother (while you see him as a right person), you are beside him in your business and you are solving the problems together. If there’s a chance that your brother might be in error, you’ll quickly understand and support him. So your brotherhood’s relationship will be better and better. The lack of full trust in the marital life is like this. In the following, we explain more about the benefits of not having full trust in marital life.
As we said, if we think that it is impossible for our partner to be in error, we may allow ourselves behave her badly. Therefore, the lack of complete trust makes us always be careful about our behavior and our words. As a result, the respect for the two people will be increased.
Before the marriage, both try to attract the attention of the other one in different ways. Most people agree that the premarital relationship is so exciting. So why isn’t it exciting after the marriage?
One of the reasons is that after the marriage, we think that our partner is ours. That is the fullest trust. So the excitement of our lives will decrease. Because we don’t try to attract her attention and satisfaction. So, if there is no such full trust after the marriage, we will try to attract the attention and satisfaction of our partner. This makes life even more exciting.
When there is no full trust, of course according to the explanation at the beginning of this article, our partner is always with us. Always respectful. We always thank her for her presence and attention. We are always trying to attract her attention and satisfaction. All of this makes our lives durable.
At the end, I hope that by reading this article, we realize that we must always try to pay attention to our partner who has lived with us for many years, to thank him and try for his happiness and satisfaction. These cases are only possible when there is no complete trust in our minds, and we should know that she/he can leave us.
Farshid Pakzat Research Group